Bop-Bop

One year ago, my Bop-bop passed from this life into the next. The grief process has been slow and steady and I'm grateful I can write this post without breaking into tears.

His favorite picture of the two of us, 1999

He and I were quite close, especially after his retirement. I loved his sense of humor, his slow smile and silent chuckle that spread from the grin on his face to a movement of his shoulders when something amused him. The man had a memory that never ceased to amaze me (and those with whom he talked) and I loved to listen to his stories from "back then." It was not uncommon for my siblings and I to tease that when Bop told a story, it often included the little details such as the time, weather, and color of shirt he was wearing. The truth isn't far from that. Unfortunately, I did not inherit that talent of awesome memory.

Bop-bop worked at Sandia National Laboratory his entire career. My best friend from college, on one of her first meetings with him, asked what he had done for a living. "Oh, stuff," was his kind, but final, reply. It caught her off guard and I'm sure there was awkward pause for a moment while she recovered her composure. Honestly, I don't know that any of us really know what he did; it was top secret at the time and he never chose to elaborate even when the information was de-classified.

He married his high school sweetheart, a gal from the other side of the alley in Chicago. They never lived more than a 10 minute drive away during my childhood and I have numerous memories of biking to their house for an afternoon, sleepovers and watching Tom Cruise in "Top Gun," sleeping in their fifth wheel on family camping trips, taking walks through those campgrounds with their dog in tow, listening to his stories and waiting for a quiet, funny comment in the midst of the normal family chaos.

Proud Bop-bop with first great-grandchild, Morgan 2010

As we danced during my wedding reception, he leaned in and whispered that while he thought I was beautiful, he preferred me in jeans. I caught a glimpse of his missing me as a young girl in that moment.

Smiling at Mallorie 2013

He and my Nana became "hoop heads" during my years of playing ball in high school and promptly purchased season tickets to the UNM Lady Lobo basketball games to watch some of the players who were on my high school team. They continued attending every home game until the season his cancer took hold.

Happily munching one of his favorite food, a hot dog, at Zoo Boise 2010

Service for his family, especially his wife, was part of his legacy. He showered her with flowers for every holiday, had a wonderful taste in jewelry and loved to buy her something sparkly for anniversaries and Christmas.

Bop-bop, Nana, Me 2013

He took in my step-dad and brothers without hesitation in 1989 when Mom re-married. He and Mark seemed close and Mark took it hard when Bop got sick. Actually, Mark seemed to adopt Bop-bop in the same way over the years, for which I will be eternally grateful.

I am blessed that I was able to travel home the February before his passing to spend a few days with family, meeting up with my brother David during that time. My only sadness is that I didn't get to chat with him once more before he slipped into the next life early in the morning of June 6, 2015. He was at home, being cared for by my mother, dad, and Nana.

Four of us (prego with Spencer) 2015

I miss you, Bop-bop and think of you often.

2011